Paul Kaiser's Blog

“I don’t know why he has to always learn the hard way.”

I’ve heard that from a lot of my elders.

“It’s like he thinks I don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Indeed, that’s pretty close to the mark.

I learn by doing, but I’m not opposed to taking advice from someone else. I don’t take advice from just anyone, though. Just because you’re a family member or an old friend doesn’t automatically mean you’re the best source for worldly life-guiding wisdom.

Share your past

If you have advice for someone, and you feel you’re qualified because of experience, you ought to share the experience in order to gain credibility. You might worry about looking foolish or looking less than perfect, but in reality, this just makes you more real, down-to-earth: believable.

Tell the person what you did that made you wiser. Field their questions about it. You’ll make a better impression than you would have up on your soap box.

Downtown pilgrimage

Bethy, Gwen, Me, and Willow. I'm happy there, not psychotic.

Friday, Leigh had to leave for the night to have some testing done. Just as she was leaving, I realized I’d forgotten an important USB key full of data at work that I’d likely need over the weekend. The kids had given Leigh a hard time all day, and I figured a walk downtown would be good for airing out their thoughts, while getting my data at the same time.

On the way home, we talked a bit about how everyone’s day went, and Bethy said something I’ll not likely forget for a long time. First, she told me sometimes when she’s next to someone, she just wants to hit them or yell at them, even though she knows she’s upset about something they had nothing to do with.

That was a bit unnerving.

However, then she said I was different.

“Not when I’m around you, though. When I’m next to you, it relaxes me, like being by a water fountain. You’re like a water fountain of calmness or something.”

Yeah… that totally made my day! I must be doing something right.

Oh, rats

This is Lightning, one of Gus' young padawan learners

Sunday morning, I got up early to do some sketches for a theatre project. When I checked on the rats, I noticed Gus was… unusually still. Gus was given to us by some friends who had their other rat die, and they didn’t want Gus to be lonely. Shortly thereafter, Gus must have had a stroke or something. He couldn’t use his back legs, so he’d just scoot around the cage or the floor. It was kind of freaky.

Anyway, Gus died. Later, I dug a hole between some garden beds and we all went outside to bury him and throw some flowers. Gwen took it the hardest, which was no surprise. Of all the kids, she seems the most empathic.

Okay to be scared

Xander, the amazing, complete with Harry Potter scar from a library chair that attacked him

Temperature in the pool was awesome today. It was about 78 degrees. With the sun out, that was perfectly comfortable.

I’d just bought Xander a life jacket his size, so he could have more freedom in the pool than the little baby floater allowed. Today, he wanted to be free in the pool, not on any raft, so I got in with him.

He said he was scared a lot, but I could see he wasn’t terrified. I just kept an eye on him as I bounced him through the water and tested his limits. Really, I was stretching limits. I told him it was okay to be scared but to move on anyway.

By the time we got done, Xander was climbing up and down the ladder and would jump off in to the pool. He really made a lot of progress, and I felt again like I must have been doing something right.

That’s about all I have to say about that. I don’t really have a snappy conclusion.

A few more photos

Xander, let's get this wagon train a'movin'

Willow eating a Star Trek Eggo waffle

Gwen explaining four square meals a day

Sammy, the most boring frog in the universe

Cricket in Sammy the frog's terrarium. The crickets are more interesting to watch than Sammy.

Plant in frog terrarium reaching down for water.